after work. went to mit lp at je to eat.
long story in the mid
but i will skip it.
went home after dat.

kip on thinking bout blessings.
how do eu define blessings?
to some. it might meant 3 meals/day.
to some. it meant good results
to some. it meant God given.
when ppl say. eu are so blessed.
and eu start counting ur blessings.
but when ppl say. oh u are so unlucky.
den eu will count ur -un-blessings.
but actually.
blessings are not up to eu to decide right?
okay. i think im not making sense liao.
i think im learning the art of RANDOM-NESS.

shocked for today. 3 things. =) & =(
well. i stil have to deal with them.
when eu see me free. it don mean that im free.
it meant dat i noe how to organise my time
when eu see me busy
it don meant that im disorganised.
it just meant that i have too mani things on hand.
when eu see me stressed.
it means dat i'm putting my burden on my ownself.
when eu see me with mani things to do. yet unstressed bout them
it don meant that those stuff are unimportant.
it jus meant that i gave all my problems to God.
so eu see. =D RANDOMNESS.

am i an alien in a human world. or a human in an alien world?

aw man.

how!

God.

can eu just on the switch in me

somwhere.

somehow.

to trust

and to believe.

will be so busy.

from 5-11,13-17,19-28. mar.

everyday out.

mann. will my mother allow?

i hope so.

cos its all brigade.

and i don wann miss anyone of them

esp

ENCOUNTER RETREAT!!!!!

let's pray

Father Lord. i thank you for everything today.

despite of all the bad things that happened.

In Jesus' name,

AMEN!

wanted to buy cake for leon.
so as dey are discussing.
i was distracting leon.
den he angry with me.
for not telling him what happen.
hahas. but i guess he's jus curious.
i mean. who wun?
but anw.in the end.
when presented him his cake.
he smile like dono wad.
hahahas. see. leon. i'm KIND! =DD

played da feng chuii. hahhas.
all thanks to me keep shouting that i wan that.
sharing.
leon nearly burst his blood vessels.
due to some reasons.
hahahhas.
but nvm. i stil love you people! =DD

dinnertime. we made lopez and leon stand on chairs.
while we sing HAPPY BIRTHDAY and ZHU NI SHENG RE KUAI LE and GOD'S BLESSING YOU
so in total. we sang 4 times. cos HAPPY BIRTHDAY must sing specific names.
bleahs. whatever. hahas.
dey were so diu lian. dey cover their faces. hahahas
went home with dor and wena.
teaching dor tmr a maths! =DD

i noe i have to serve wholeheartedly and not pick and choose whenever i feel like serving.but you are so out. like huh. like a jigsaw piece of another puzzle.but im trying to fit eu in. somewhere. somehow. i seriously hope i can or not i will come across as an ignorant brat.which i don wan to.i have to stop asking WHY ME.

A is obedient but not close

B is rebellious yet close.

same method. diff outcome.

the only diff is handling.

am i really such a fail?

i noe i shudnt be thinking this way

but. the feeling is jus so strong.

SATAN. eu lousy piig.

go away lahh

always come kajiaoo me

not sian isit.

the battle had already been won by God 2k years ago

eu are a LOSER.

so stop lying to me

eu are not going to take over me this time round

i believe in u the last time

and i knew what is the outcome.

HORRIBLE. A MESS. A HUGE MESS.

that's my life with eu.

so now i'm back with my DADDY.

and eu are so out of my world.

get out. my world is full of my BIG DADDY.

Jesus i live for eu
in everything i do
and when eu call my name
i jus cant help but sing ur praises
i give eu all my praise.
i serve eu all my days
gonna let the whole world noe.Jesus i am so in love with you

God
i found in you
everything i was searching for
and eu given me what i needed
and its so much more.
so im giving every part of me to eu.
wun eu take my life
i'm living it for eu!

Jesus i live for eu
in everything i do
and when eu call my name
i jus cant help but sing ur praises
i give eu all my praise.
i serve eu all my days
gonna let the whole world noe.Jesus i am so in love with you

everyday its eu i live for
gonna serve u all my days
every step i take
u 're with me
Jesus eu're the only way

everyday its eu i live for
gonna serve u all my days
every step i take
u 're with me
Jesus eu're the only way

everyday its eu i live for
gonna serve u all my days
every step i take
u 're with me
Jesus eu're the only way

Jesus i live for you
in everything i do
and when eu call my name
jus cant help but sing ur praises

i give eu all my praise
i serve u all my days
gonna let the whole world noe
Jesus i am so in love with you

Jesus i live for you
in everything i do
and when eu call my name
jus cant help but sing ur praises

i give eu all my praise
i serve u all my days
gonna let the whole world noe
Jesus i am so in love with you

ytd i slept at 2am. cos God didnt wan to let me go without talking to Him.
was tempted to skip QT. so i didnt do it.( von. read finish den decide to beat me. LOLS)
tossed and turned on bed. from 11 pm til 1 plus. jus cant slp. no matter how.
finally. i just said out. fine. God eu win. i'll do my QT.(bad attitude. don learn)
so i did. and i began to think of my problems.
discipleship. ability to handle.own worth even.
and finally i jus cant take it
and i shouted out of the window.
GOD! HELP ME!
cool mann. thank God my parents didnt wake up. =/
immediately after i said dat.
i heard God saying
i've been waiting for eu to say this 3 words.
now that eu had ask. i will.
Matt 7:7. =D
i cried.
sorry God. i didnt listen to you.
i didnt believe dat eu cud help me
i rely on my own.
OVERWHELMED. is how i felt.
and God just shown me a picture.
it shows a car driving.
and i am in the driver seat
and God is beside me
and i goes straight.
and He say turn left!
andi turned
this go on for awhile. everytime he say turn, i turn
but after awhile. i saw the road was familiar.
so i gei kiang. before He say turn. i turn first.
i didnt bother to look at him to cfm.
i jus went my way.
den he said. TURN RIGHT.
and i turned.
immediately i banged into a tree/wall. ( dono lehs)
so i turned to Him and i blamed Him for it.
and He listened to me scold. til i quiet down
den He say. that "turn right" was for the previous bend.
not this. but the previous bend eu didnt wait for my instruction and u turned ur own way.
and when sth happen. eu blame Me.
but if eu are willingly to come back to Me.
i will guide eu to the road again.
repair ur car. like nth had happen before.
YES I'M WILLING LORD.
for those who are reading. i hope this will motivate eu all! =DD

oh btw. i did do my QT.! =DD

today got new ppl come---KAILING!
can bully uh~ hahhas
gary throw her to me.
ask me teach her
huh. like i ownself oso CMI lehs.
but well. i taught her what i noe.
45=23. 30=40.
that is so MATHS-wrong.

prabu hate me for today lehs.
he so far.
stepped
kicked
banged
spill hot water
on/into me.

JAW DROP.
but is bu xiao xin one nahh.
hahhas

after work. went to mit lp and mk at plaza mac
i'm sick of mac lehs.
roar. when can ii stop eating mac
somemore. always go there eat same food.
double roar.

see them study econs.
felt very. xian mu>
that they are studying.
ppl who are studying. must be thinking i SIAO.
but it's true.
wait til eu don have book to let eu study.
eu'll beg for some.

someone bought sth for me the day b4.
thou its a small thing.
well. it meant alot to me.
=D

oh yahh. i went to buy sth at waston.
and i put my drink on the counter.
and the person push daoo!
and the whole coke fall straight on me.
siann!!!
thank God my pants is black derhs.
=DD

I WANN LEARN GUITAR!!!!!!!

so i called mani ppl. ask them free to eat not.
but of cos. many are not. chu er leh.
who wun be with their family?
anw. at last found munkidd.
but oso not sure wad time he can.
i hope it will be before i hungry finish.
LOLS.

suddenly felt how reliable God is.
and how unreliable ppl can be.
so ppl. don rely on HUMAN.
rely on Him.
cos He is 24/7 THERE FOR EU!!!

one wud be with someone even if she don like him.
one wud use a guy who happen to like her. to spite her ex.
one wud just accept the guy becuase he:
takes her books for her.
buy stuff for her.
send her home everyday.
and etc
all i can say is.
she don need a boyfwen.
she nid a maid cum driver.
seriously. weird idea she have. =/

kinda sad uh. actually we are BEST.
now cos of a changed relationship
we became jus NORMAL.
anything good. eu will tell her. but not me.
anything good. eu will call her. but not me.
anything good. eu will look for her. but not me.
but anything bad. eu will ask me. but not her.
anything SK. eu will look for me. but not her.
why? eu expect me to be tehre for ur worst. but not for ur good.
eu expect me to jus take the back seat to her.
eu expect many. but eu don give many.
how can?
true. God loves a cheerful giver.
but one can at least expect to be repaid right?
i don need eu to bow to me
i jus wan eu to noe dat i'm here
and not jus a RESCUE BUTTON whr eu press for help
when eu are in trouble.

i'm more den that.

today:
-sent yuzhen to airport.
ATE POPEYE!!!
-met rowena to shop. at town.
I WAS LATE!~
i mi lu-ed okay. so ke lian.
-ask papa to fetch me!
WENT SHOPPING WITH MAMA DEY ALL.
-came home.
BLOGGED!

dat's all.

i decided.
i gonna have a walk with God once every week.
cos i really felt God talking to me at that time.
ppl. eu shud try it. it's good.
for health too lehs
cos eu bian walk bian pray mah
haha!
von. eu reading this?
make sure i keep to it!
eu shud try it too. haha!

MENTALITY.

angry lah. to those who understand who am i refering.
please tell the person to shut it.
for those who dono.
i don wish to let you noe.
unless you wanna try ur luck. eu can ask me.

WHY DO HUMANS HAVE MOUTH LAH.
WHY DO THEY HAVE THROAT?
WHY DO THEY HAVE VOICE?
WHY DO PEOPLE TALK!??!?!?!?!

ask me if sth happy happened today
seriously. i dono.
but i will thank God.
cos it wud had been worse if He hadn't been with me
=/

first girl we talked to.
only se c 1 leh! and she had her bf since p sku?!
and. her mother allow! is her mama nuts?
well. hahas.
she waiting for cab to go home
so i said. den let clara help eu flag
den we talk til cab come lor?
den she say okay
so i cont saying.
FYI.
she is a strong buddhist i think
everything is bout buddha. =/
but in the end.
i asked her. so who do eu think now. dat can save u?
i already prepared hao speech how to answer her if she say buddha liao
but she said.
JESUS of cos!

shocked. speechless.
just den. i was going to ask if she wanna receive
clara got the stupid dumb cab.
oh well. i got her number.
gotta follow up with her.
YES!
( btw. clara, wasn't blaming eu. jus finding it funny in a way. haha.)

cant eu jus spare a thought for others lah. whatever. S-E-L-FI-S-H.

actually was very nervous. cos veryyyy longgg nv do street e lerh. and i had to guide clara.
so as i waited for clara to reach. i did pray hard. even walk outside at the cc dere. cos didnt wan distraction in mac.
phew. thanks God. for making everything fine. =DD

in total. 24 ppl received Christ. jiayou ACT4!

dinner with cell afterwards. with the additions of lopez and bigBEN.
ate zi cha! dumb lopez keep shouting. hahhaas
for EG. wan to order drink so lopez shouted
SHUI!
den the aunty came
den we wan order food liao.
so he shouted
ORDER!
again the aunty came.
lols. we were laughing til peng.

afterwards. walked von to bus stop. while waiting for lz to call me
cos making contact len.
in the end he made on his own. -_-
nvm. so we walked to plaza. cos he wan eat.
guess whr?
MAC.
the food dat i had been eating since 2 wk ago

called andy to come too.
so while waiting for him to come
me and lz talked.
rubbish and serious stuff
got me thinking. cos of a sentence
but i'm really glad bout it! =DD
very long nv talk with him ler
and so we were thinking how did we meet
stil cant think of the answer leh.
anyone wan to fill in the answer?
LOLS

weird v-day to pass.
but its good to be different for once.
at least i didnt got the same v-dae 3 years in a row.
and i decide this kind of v-dae is much better
but my life wud be much better and happier
if SOMEONE wud jus REPLY MY MSGS.
if that's you. please do so asap.
i'm going mental case soon.

SKW leh. hahas

which is nice. hahahhas

ate spag.at the next cafe. nce eh. or im hungry. hahas

HAHA

I will worship you until the very end

very true. von. agree to the boldS? =D

not to mention evil and blahhs.

generally. well bah. but first hour of my first day
eu expect me to memorise all the names and pic of the DRINKS?!
don be mad!

lucky got prabu jiu wo de mind. den he tell me what is what.. and i served.
gary and alex keep staring. scared i do wrong. hahaas
got skill one kay! =DD

after work, went down with yy to church office.to find pastor.
talked bout wad course to go.
he gave many advices. which are good
i listened to him in the end.
choosen and i really felt peace.

so i shall stick to this decision.
afterall. God has a road for me to take.
even if i put it as my last choice.
if dat is what God wants for me, He will stil let me go into that course
so no point thinking so hard. yea?

after that. ate with daBEN lopez hong weiyan von at mac.
lopez birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOY. hahas.
actually wan go eat chicken rice one!
den me and lopez went to find seats first
but daBEN/von wanted to eat mac. so called us back
lame. but nvm. mac is alright. hahahhas

this few days very busy.. want to do discipleship oso hard..
but no time find time!!!

yes. jiayou CELIA.

surrounded by people. who say dey will support you no matter what! but when trouble come. and dey are overwhelmed. poof. u are gone from their head. left to fend for yourself. thinking that no one care. and eu look up in despair. thinking why is God not helping me. and eu see it. eu see God's face. He had been looking after you all along. even if He is not AROUND you. He is always THERE. somewhere. that eu don notice.

its not that He is not THERE. its just that you didnt look THERE.

sermon was very true and to the heart today. it took him 2 years to answer a prayer of mine. a question that is always in my mind. that i don dare to voice out. rarely ppl noe bout it. except for one i guess. i complain. i scolded God for it. why didnt He helped me. but now i noe. it was for my own good. God. i thank you for everything.had a vision today. yes. its true. im gonna work closely with God. i wanna noe wad He wants me to do.

today cell and dinner was so funnyy!!!!!! cos forfeit was chilli. (big and small), tobasco sauce with potato chips,lemon slices. its like OMG? and somemore. the game we played is---- the *clap clap snap snap* game! name game. and i;m like. super slow in that game? ahahasthank God dere were "slower" players in the cell. its combined with 4.2 btw. in the end. qing yang midBEN tio chilli. forget if stil got other ppl not. hahas. hong tio potato chip. lan lor him. cant finish. nid ppl help. why hong? long ti cant take it? hahahas.

den during dinner time. after everyone eat finish. so lame. yang kendrick qizhi and a few guys from other cell. play game. SEE WHO CAN EAT THE MOST CHILLI!!! lame lah. cant eat chilli stil wan play. den in the end. some of them cry. den face red red. don wan say is who. don make them diu lian. hahas. den i offered tissue and my drink to them. hahahhas. lousy lah eu guys. but watching eu all tear is fun. HAHAS.

i stil cant get over my english results. God. help me. when people ask me if im happy bout my results or not. i dono if my answer shud be a yes or a no. yes i got the distinction. but it doesnt mean anything right?! those w/o >5 distintions. can even get better results den those who did right. so it didnt meant anything. wad mattered was the overall aggregate. and. i dono. im jus disappointed. yet i cant be disppointed in front of certain ppl. munkidd. if eu are reading. eu understand wad i mean right. =/but stil i will thank God that my english wasn't a D7. thank God that He gave me the 5 distinctions. thank God that He had gave me a1 for my CH. really. by God's grace. a blind wud noe im hopeless in CH. and i passed my chem. can eu ppl believe it. i studied like only 2 wks prior to chem exams. munkidd. proud of me? WHHHEH! thank God. you rocked my world. i LOVE YOU!!!

i surrendered my life to Your ways
i have learnt wad it means to obey
Jesus my whole life is changed by You

im walking the path You have made
im seeking the truth everyday
Jesus my heart had been changed by You

can't walked away if i tried.
' cause Your love better than life!

now the sun is shining bright and it just wun set
cause Your life is alive and it lights my step
my heart is amazed everyday to the next
Your joy overtakes and i cant forget bout it!

was actually very calm

til su and evan start panicking beside me

den i start to feel abit of the tension

but i prayed for God to give me peace.

an i really felt so peaceful.

thank you God

den there come the distinction scorers slide show.

so shocked to see my name.

but whhehh!

i admit

im happy.

review of my results

5 distinctions

L1R4 12

L1R5 14

some unexpected ones:

my COMBINED HUMANS got A1!

it must be God's grace!!!!

let me explain why in a sentence

i never PASSED my CH in my whole sec sku life.

get the pic? hahahs

and my A MATHS. A2

maybe to some is good.

but im really disappointed

those who noe me well. eu noe why.

and my ENG. worst of all.

nv will i expect it.

but it happened.

but nvm!

THANK GOD.

it's not a D7.

for those who did well.

G-DOUBLE O-D-J-O-B!

for those who did not do as well

jiayous and stil b>
G-DOUBLE O -D- J-O-B!

slp well pple.

met yy at 10 plus to go orchard shopping. which don hav much shou huo leh. except for some accessories. hahahs. den i met rowena and doti at 3 for bible study. den many ppl came. JUN DA!! hahahas. the irritating pigg. den we went for prayer walk! til 5 like dat. den we sat there and rubbishh. bout cell outing. almost decided. now waiting for zq to see can not. by 6 all of us are going home/lot 1 liao

according to someone~ its pronouced as ee-kay-yer. LOLS.

hahahahhas. at least he said "hong nam" and not "toilet".

now that's lame nor. got down and asked uncle. he said we are heading to BEDOK. hurried down the bus and walk to mrt. haahas. ann is so panicky can.

summary of the camp?

slping at 4am. waking up at 6.30am. makes eu a PANDA.

plus 4 hrs of kayaking.

tadas!

eu get a chao-ta-panda =D

and dats ME. =(

mani good things happen

mani bad things happened too

if eu noe it, eu noe it

if eu dono. den wan noe

ask me

sorry to the mani ppl who talked to me and i dao-ed eu or at most give eu the fu yan face.

sorry to hong for the thing dat happened.

thank God for ryan during today's kayaking

thank God also for joel who change kayak with me

thank God for zhicheng who "rescued" me mani times today.

thank God for everything.

AMEN.